Niece3 is an adult, but has never taken a step not directed by her mother. She doesn't drive because her mother and stepfather wouldn't allow her to learn. She moved out once, but her stepfather committed suicide shortly thereafter and Sister made her move home to keep her company.
Then Niece3 tried getting a job, but Sister had to have carpal tunnel surgery and forced her to quit so she could stay home and
Anyway, after much debate with myself I decided to go to the funeral. Mainly to remind Niece3 that she still has family because I'm not sure how well she'll manage out there in the Big World on her own.
So I took bravely took myself off to California. The day after I arrived I took Niece3 to lunch. She wouldn't tell me where she lives, so I picked her up on a street corner (no, I don't think that is where she actually lives.) and took her out for lunch. She had previously said the funeral would be on Friday, but at lunch she informed me that the arrangements had been changed to comply with her mother's wishes. There would be no funeral, she was going to be cremated and the urn placed in her second husband's grave. No one was to be informed of the actual time any of this would take place, not even Niece3. Well, okay then.
So I asked Niece3 if there would be any memorial of any sort and she said she and some friends were getting together on Friday anyway to have an informal wake and I could attend that if I wanted. We decided where to meet and I dropped her back off on her corner.
Friday I arrived at the designated McDonald's thinking I was just picking her up to go to the wake. But she wasn't waiting outside. So I left Big Sis and BIL in the car (BAD neighborhood, they wouldn't let me go alone, even if I had wanted to) and went looking for her, only to find her and two other people seated in the McDonald's. I trotted up and apologized in case I was late and she said, "No you're on time, we were early."
"Ok, well where are we going?"
Niece3, "What do you mean?"
"Where is the wake?"
So the six of us sat in uncomfortable silence drinking McDonald's coffee and trying to think of something nice to say. Or anything to say. Big Sis and BIL and I really didn't know how to react.
It was the weirdest funeral/memorial/wake I have ever attended, but then I have never considered McDonald's when doing my Eternal Planning.